things change. grow, i guess. sometimes diminish, sometimes die and disappear. but mainly grow.
i'm making choices. well, i'm starting to. or at least i'm thinking about starting to. i will start with certain lobes in my brain. first, the motor. the one that buzzes constantly, itching, probing. so how about this: i will start by enriching my creative aura, if you will. my magic maker. my whirlwind. my batshit insanity.
i will broaden the scope of what is and what can be. kind of like a vitamin boost, or a back massage, or throwing the soul into the pit of existence and watching it swim about, floundering. eyes gaping. lungs gasping.
that sort of thing.
i want to start by knowing that i'm not the only one alive out there. i want to know what others think, what others feel. what others want so very much to say, but cant ever find the words. words are funny like that. they always seem to trip us up, to taunt us with their permanence, their simplicity, their mystery.
i want to know what keeps the world spinning in orbit; although, i probably wouldn't understand. i definitely wouldn't understand. perhaps someone, anyone, could explain it in simple terms, with symbols, diagrams--maybe pictures. like how in children's books everything is so easy, so beautiful, so simply formulaic--unraveling life's most profound qualities in a single stanza.
that was then.
but was it?
